​My first date after five years.


“I woke up feeling different today, light, excited and possibly happy. That’s probably because I have a date today with someone I met through a mutual friend, I haven’t met him face to face previously but after the conversation we had on Whatsapp I feel like I have known you for the past few years of my life and possibly have loved you a lot. I am impressed by your personality, kindness and attitude towards life in general. It’s hard to admit, but life is not really easy especially when you grew up with no parents but you still maintain a positive attitude, lift yourself up and survive through life challenges. 

Anyway let me stop rumbling about life before I begin to sound like a preacher. OMG! I am running late, time just flew by today and my date is at 12:00 but I haven’t even left home yet and its already 11:38 am – I can’t believe I am running late for the first date I have after the end of my 5 year relationship. Finally, I am here and Gugulethu Park is packed with people, probably because of the soccer match taking place later today between Keizer Chiefs and Orlando Pirates in Moses Mabhida stadium. I try calling him but no answer, he must be running late. Good! That gives me a chance to change from these high heel shoes to my usual flats, what was I thinking? My feet aren’t used to high heels, hence why they are burning already. Let me go freshen up in the ladies room.

Durban Gugulethu Park

Few minutes have gone by and he still hasn’t called or arrived, I hope I am not being stood up. Anyway let me join the crowd, watch the dancers and see if there’s anything interesting. Finally he arrives (ten minutes late but he is here), I am glad that he’s here, I would hug him but then I just met him and it might be too soon for hugs or touching. Anyway, he looks cute, corny smile and well dressed with the Springbok t-shirt, jeans and nice sneakers – not exactly my ideal kind of style for a guy but I will accept it just for today. Oh-oh! Awkward, we have nothing to talk about now that we are face to face and there is this awkward moment of silent. “What are we going to eat?” yes! A conversation starter, I am craving a burger but I also need to maintain my standard of being a ‘classy lady’ and not come across as someone who eats too much. So I go for a salad instead, as I mentioned before – the Gugulethu Park was extremely crowded and every restaurant that we went to was full. So we decided to take a walk and we ended up at a Spur restaurant on ‘West Street’ and had our lunch there.

Durban ‘West Street’

Lunch was nice and we talked about what we wanted & expected from a relationship. I am a simple girl who just wants love, affection, respect, honesty, romance and support. If a person has no intension of giving me any of the things I mentioned above, they shouldn’t even bother approaching me because I don’t compromise on any of them. Anyway, it turned out that we had a lot in common, until the ‘SEX’ topic came up and that’s another thing that I don’t compromise on. I don’t exactly put a time frame on when we’ll start being intimate in a relationship because I can’t predict when the relationship will flourish into something great. I like to believe that a new couple should become intimate once they’ve had a chance to get to know one another well, regardless of how long that takes (it may take just a few weeks or even a year) and sex shouldn’t be rushed.

 This first date wasn’t easy, I was nervous and unprepared for the topics that came up like my past relationship and why it ended but I think I did well. I feel like I just finished a nerve wracking interview, I haven’t been on a date in a long while and it’s very difficult to predict how things will go, but I am a risk taker who is not scared of putting herself out there and I never shy away from a challenge.”

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Till next time. Becoming me!


4 thoughts on “​My first date after five years.”

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